Well I'm so very proud of myself. Yesterday I was feeling a bit under the weather(depressed.) When I get this way I have a tendency to eat everything I can get my hands on. I haven't a real way to exercise, as of yet. But I hope as soon as I win my case a lot will change, not just my weight. Taking the stairs helps and walking my son to the bus stop adds to it as well. I have to find someone to talk to when i get this way, it would help if their in the same situation as I am. This way we can help each other out. If you need a friend email is at the top right hand or send me a message at the right hand side of the page.
I haven't taken any full picture shots of me yet. I will soon. I have to be proactive on this issue. I want to live to see my grand kids one day. My son is 14, will be 15 in May. He has been one of my biggest supporters. I love him so much.
I have to close for now...its 2:10 am.
Love to all,
Karen Singleton
Monday, September 23, 2013
Thursday, September 19, 2013
My Story in a Nut Shell...
I've had issues ever since I was a teenager. I guess it all started when I was a senior in high school. I'm 5'2" and I weighed 110 at the time. A male student approached me and call me a fat ass. I went home and looked in the mirror and couldn't see it.
I have a father that has never really liked me and would make it known even still to this day at the age of forty-nine. At twenty-five, in front of friends and family, this man says out loud "Do you really think you need that piece of cake?" Once again I looked in the mirror and didn't see it. I wasn't fat, but that would soon change.
My weight fluctuated up and down for many years, after that. My depression kicked in and that didn't help. When you're depressed it can go one of two ways, you could become a hermit or you start to eat to make yourself feel better. I did both, but I have learned since then that you need to listen to yourself and your heart. I wouldn't go out of the house because I didn't want to hear the negative things people would say about me. I would go through a drive through and order two hamburgers with two sodas. to give the illusion that I was ordering for two. I would eat until I literally puked. No, I wasn't benging or purging. I was so depressed that I thought that food was my friend, but it was killing me and not realizing it. The eating disorder that I do have is starving myself. I still find myself doing it to this day, out of habit, when I feel like I've eaten too much. Yes, I'm trying to control that aspect of my life. I looked in the mirror and hated what I saw and what I had become. It wasn't me, and I hated me.
This is my opinion and please don't take offence to it. I do believe that society has a lot to do with the way men and women visualize themselves. We see it in the movies and in the magazines we read, as well as TV. It's used to sell whatever product that needs to be sold. What we see are the Twiggy's of the 60's and 70's and the Kate Moss's and Amy Winehouse's of today. I don't have any animosity toward these women, living or dead. Their the image of under weight women. So many young girls think that this is what they need to look like. This is only my opinion and it's not healthy. What we need are some women that are real role models. So in the long run we want to be that person and would do just about anything to get that way. The end result is Karen Carpenter, who saw herself fat and ended up dying because she believed that she was. People need to wake up and smell the coffee. I look at myself in the mirror everyday and I tell myself that I love me. I know this may sound a bit stupid but I write post-it notes to remind me of what I live for and that I'm worth being here. I'm beautiful inside and out.
Once I opened my eyes, I did lose a lot of weight and felt good about myself. Met someone(who turned out to be bad for me.)Depression soon reared it's ugly head, and I began to eat again. After two miscarriages I got pregnant with my son. I was then faced with yet another issue, gestational diabetes, and now I'm type 2.
Question: Can Gestational Diabetes lead to type 2 diabetes?
Answer: The simple answer is yes.
I will be posting more on this blog, because like I said earlier it's good therapy for my mental state....lol.
Love to all,
Karen Singleton
I have a father that has never really liked me and would make it known even still to this day at the age of forty-nine. At twenty-five, in front of friends and family, this man says out loud "Do you really think you need that piece of cake?" Once again I looked in the mirror and didn't see it. I wasn't fat, but that would soon change.
My weight fluctuated up and down for many years, after that. My depression kicked in and that didn't help. When you're depressed it can go one of two ways, you could become a hermit or you start to eat to make yourself feel better. I did both, but I have learned since then that you need to listen to yourself and your heart. I wouldn't go out of the house because I didn't want to hear the negative things people would say about me. I would go through a drive through and order two hamburgers with two sodas. to give the illusion that I was ordering for two. I would eat until I literally puked. No, I wasn't benging or purging. I was so depressed that I thought that food was my friend, but it was killing me and not realizing it. The eating disorder that I do have is starving myself. I still find myself doing it to this day, out of habit, when I feel like I've eaten too much. Yes, I'm trying to control that aspect of my life. I looked in the mirror and hated what I saw and what I had become. It wasn't me, and I hated me.
This is my opinion and please don't take offence to it. I do believe that society has a lot to do with the way men and women visualize themselves. We see it in the movies and in the magazines we read, as well as TV. It's used to sell whatever product that needs to be sold. What we see are the Twiggy's of the 60's and 70's and the Kate Moss's and Amy Winehouse's of today. I don't have any animosity toward these women, living or dead. Their the image of under weight women. So many young girls think that this is what they need to look like. This is only my opinion and it's not healthy. What we need are some women that are real role models. So in the long run we want to be that person and would do just about anything to get that way. The end result is Karen Carpenter, who saw herself fat and ended up dying because she believed that she was. People need to wake up and smell the coffee. I look at myself in the mirror everyday and I tell myself that I love me. I know this may sound a bit stupid but I write post-it notes to remind me of what I live for and that I'm worth being here. I'm beautiful inside and out.
Once I opened my eyes, I did lose a lot of weight and felt good about myself. Met someone(who turned out to be bad for me.)Depression soon reared it's ugly head, and I began to eat again. After two miscarriages I got pregnant with my son. I was then faced with yet another issue, gestational diabetes, and now I'm type 2.
Question: Can Gestational Diabetes lead to type 2 diabetes?
Answer: The simple answer is yes.
The risk for type 2 diabetes is higher in women who have had gestational diabetes (diabetes of pregnancy). In general, type 2 diabetes will occur in about 40% of women with gestational diabetes over the following 10 years. This number increases to the 50% range if obesity is present.
I quit smoking and drinking(knock on wood, it's been 15 yrs clean and sober.)Watched what I ate and tested my blood sugar levels four times a day. Son was born four weeks early, at four pounds eight ounces, Delivered by emergency c-section. I was once again faced with my weight, ballooning to one hundred and ninety-seven. I was still facing my depression and seeking help, I was put on anti-depressants. I was told by my therapist to write a journal, he said getting things off my chest would help and it's one reason I write blogs...lol.
I have learned a lot in the forty-nine years I've been on this plant, and it's not all roses. So why sugar coat it? We want to make ourselves look good, but in actuality we are all in denial. I know I was. I have several health issues, that require medication and RA (rheumatoid arthritis)is one that sucks the most.
"Joint destruction is the hallmark of rheumatoid arthritis. The immune system attacks joint tissues for unknown reasons.
White blood cells travel to the joint lining, or synovium, and cause inflammation known as synovitis. This leads to symptoms of warmth, redness, swelling, and pain.
The chronic inflammation of RA causes the normally thin synovium to become thick and joints to become swollen and puffy. With time, the inflamed synovium invades and destroys the cartilage and bone within the joint.
A recent study by researchers at the Mayo Clinic found that obese individuals were 25 percent more likely to develop rheumatoid arthritis than people of normal weight. And although it may seem intuitive that excess body weight could cause joint pain, says Eric Matteson, a rheumatologist at the Mayo Clinic who led the study, the link between rheumatoid arthritis and obesity is more than just stress on the joints from being heavy."Even though I have severe joint damage in both knees, I still manage to walk to the corner store or walk up and down two flights of stairs everyday. I know that there is no cure for RA but I'm not going to let it win. I have gone from 249 to weighing 209. I know that I'm not alone in this world and I know that I'm not a doctor. However, I'm here if anyone needs to talk. Someone that knows what you are dealing with and what you're going through. It's a support system. I also want to thank Sean Patrick Flanery for being such a great inspiration to everyone.I will be posting more on this blog, because like I said earlier it's good therapy for my mental state....lol.
Love to all,
Karen Singleton
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